21. I am currently in the process of re-writing, editing, and publishing a Bible Study called Deep Encounter with the Call. It's all about finding out what God's call on your life is, how to live in it through christian practices, and the enemy's strategy that opposes God's call. I first wrote it when I was sixteen and knew that God wanted to use it for something big. Get it on the market. I didn't think it was good enough so I put it off. Well, better late than never!
20. I absolutely hate losing friends. I hate connecting emotionally to someone and then dropping that connection. I hate getting close to people if the friendship/relationship doesn't go anywhere or just stops being. I have learned, however, that when God sets a standard, it's meant to be obeyed. When God gives a purpose for knowing someone, it's best to follow it and trust that He knows best. I have learned that when God removes friends from my life, it is because it was harming me in someway and He has a higher plan. He always replaces what was lost. It's always best to obey the Lord and surrender to Him. It's not easy. It still hurts. It's totally right.
19. I have a sense of humor! Ever since I was little, I always was told to lighten up or take a joke. Somewhere between now and then, I have gotten a sense of humor. It's late in development and usually shows itself in stupidity but I think it's hilarious! I love laughing and making people laugh, even if it's at my own expense. Hey! It keeps me humble! I also use "lol" ALOT! I find joy in little things and love to act absolutely ridiculous when I can to brighten someone's day- even my own. This is not to say that I can be and love depth and being serious- when I need to. I have clearly gone from quiet and introverted, to excited and extroverted! :)
18. I LOVE coffee! I probably have caffeine running through my blood but I can't help it. I love the taste, the color, the variety. I know a good cup of joe when i taste it and probably spend too much money on weekly latte's. Yes, this is an addiction; but it's not hurting anyone (except maybe my wallet, at times) Don't worry! I know how to control myself and stop when needed. I'm not the person that "needs" her coffee to wake up or survive the day. I just like it!
17. I have known since the beginning of this year 2010 that God was and is going to do something huge in my life. That I will step into my calling. That my prayer for what He wants me to do and where He wants me to go- will be answered. I have also known that I would probably be called to California. Why? I don't know. I always ask God to give me the desires of His heart and to put in me, the things and places and dreams that He has for me. I guess this is it. When I was visiting friends in California and helping with their church, i just knew that this was where God was calling me. He spoke to me during a prayer meeting one night and said, "What are you willing to sacrifice to receive the plans I have for you?....This is where i want you. Everything has prepared you for this moment. Trust me in everything, I'll bring everything to you without you having to do anything and you'll know that it's Me. You'll be here by September." Imagine my shock when I heard an actual plan instead of "wait." (which was what I was hearing the past two years) So needless to say, I'm trusting God and He's bringing me to Cali
16. Surrender. It's a word and action that I sing about. Write about. And try to put into practice. I have learned however, that surrendering is not telling God to take all of me and giving Him all of me- with my hand still over what I just gave Him. OR with me watching Him and deciding that it's really better off in my control. What a crock! God's ways are higher and more perfect than my ways. I have also realized that surrender is what allows God to bring His perfect will to pass in my life. The thing that I want desperately can finally come alive. Surrender.
15. If you know me or have seen anything that I've written, heard any conversations I have had, etc; you will know that I am totally obsessed with Jesus Christ. I will talk about Him in everything and will somehow bring Him up in every conversation. Some people get annoyed because I talk about Him and who He is and what He's done and doing and will do- ALOT. I don't think that this is a bad thing. I want my life to count and I'm not ashamed of Him and I will not be silent! If you don't like this, deal with it! :)
14. I love writing! I journal, write poetry, write songs (well, lyrics; sometimes music) I text 3 pages at a time, take ridiculously detailed notes, have more pens and notebooks than necessary, and want to do something with this. I have alot to say. I love words and making pictures out of them. I think that writing things down is a beautiful and important way to bring freedom to thoughts and memories come alive. Hence, why I am once again, blogging.
13. I love singing! More importantly, I love worshiping! When i was younger, I never wanted to sing in a church. I sang in karaoke contests, talent shows, and was on my worship team. But I really wanted to make it big! I recorded a few things before and tried entering into different "american idol" type gigs, but nothing ever came from them. looking back on it, I see how God had a very different plan. I am now a worship leader and there is nothing that brings me more joy! It's such a glorious and wonderful privilege to be able to lead others into His presence.
12. I had taken piano lessons for 2 years and still can't read sheet music. I think I find "c" and that's about it! I got so fed up with this because I really want to play piano, well. So, I went to Guitar Center, bought myself a chord chart, copied some music and taught myself. I still don't think that I'm very good but 3 years later, it actually sounds like a song! I'm now trying my hand at writing my own songs. They all tend to sound the same. I love the chords Bm, Am7, and C#m7.
11. I'm actually trying really hard to think about 11 other things to put here. I'm thinking that I'll talk about some of my favorite things. Maybe give a testimony or two...here's the countdown!
10. I've always wanted to be an Interior Designer, go to college for it, open up my own business, and bring life to peoples homes. I planned my home-schooled, high school career to aim toward this plan. Well, God had a very different plan. When I was about to send my application in to Virginia Mardi College, God clearly spoke to me and said, "this is not what I have for you. You are going into full-time ministry." Long story short: God took away my desire for this and I enrolled in my church's intern program. I've never regretted this decision.
9. I prefer reading to watching movies or television. Although I do looove movies. Reading takes me to a place that I can't go when watching a movie. I can't imagine the scenery, hear the characters voices, peek into their thoughts; when watching a movie. I have many books. I have read over 2,000 books since the time I was 11. I know this because I used to keep a notebook of all the books i've read. I used to read 3 or 4 at a time. I carried (and still do) books with me so I had something to do, no matter where I was. Because of this, I never played sports.
8. When I started becoming interested in guys, I realized that it's important to have sport knowledge. At least understand what a quarter back is! A guy I liked at the time was really into football. Desperate for conversation and wanting to impress him, I looked up football rules, stats, players, plays, etc. He brought up a conversation about football one time and I launched into a rant. I think I intimidated him because he had nothing to teach me after this. Lesson I learned: Guys like to teach girls about sports. Leave something for them to teach you.
7. I hate bugs. Insects. Spiders. *shiver* I don't think they're cute and don't want to have anything crawling on me. There is nothing fun about feeling a hundred legs on my arm. I like snakes, lizards, iguana's...those creatures are cool. Most of the time they don't bite or harm me. Yes. Bugs harm me. They create itching and bites. I somehow attract the fleas from my cats and so last summer my legs looked diseased. It was pretty gross. So, yeah. Bugs are nasty. the end.
6. I've always been set apart. Have never really fit in to any specific group or wanted to. When I had a group of friends, I still felt like an outcast. Probably an insecurity of mine, but I just want a real connection. I find that I prefer to have friendships one-on-one. I subconsciously avoid groups at parties and tend to go from person to person. I think it's more relational this way.
5. I have never really officially been in an actual dating relationship. In Jr. High and High school, I liked the same guy. I always wanted God to bring whoever it was I was supposed to be with, to me. I didn't want to have multiple ex-boyfriends and think that dating casually is really just practicing for divorce. It teaches you discontentment and in a sense, disloyalty. I did however date one guy on and off for about 6 months. This was not a godly relationship and so there was nothing really good out of it. I had fun, don't get me wrong; but it caused problems. Why did I say that I've never officially been in a dating relationship? Because this guy and i never had an "official date", we constantly were second guessing what exactly we were and there was alot of confusion. I don't really know exactly what to call this. At the same time, i don't regret it.
4. I try to live with NO regrets. The past is what molds us into who we are in the present. Looking back at past mistakes long enough to learn and grow from them is ok. Regret tends to keep a person from moving forward, always wishing they wouldn't have done or said this or that. In reality, having never done or said this or that would not have brought a lesson to their life. Our past usually tends to help someone else through their present.
3. I am not an alcoholic. I like the taste of alcohol but don't think it's that big of a deal. Alcoholism runs through all sides of my family and I refuse to add myself to the cycle. I have tasted a variety of drinks at family events but don't make a big stink out of it because it really isn't. I think that when people make a mountain out of a molehill, that person tends to want to climb it instead of hop over it. Like, a kid who has a parent that talks up drinking so much that it is such a forbidden thing, will naturally make the kid want to try it and maybe participate in it. Why? Because we all have a rebel inside of us. Give no reason to rebel and this won't really be an issue.
2. I am proud to say that I am a complete virgin. I believe that sex is a gift from God and is blessed in a marriage only. I view it as a physical model of intimacy with God. There is love, oneness, unity, emotion, connection, etc; and it is the most emotional, physical, and spiritual connection that a person can ever have. I vow to save myself for marriage and encourage you to do the same :)
1. I love family. My mom is my best friend, we can talk about anything and everything and constantly do. I have 8 brothers (2 of them are step) and love them all! Technically, by biological terms, I am an only child. My mom and my dad have only created me. They had gotten divorced before I was born and both remarried and had other children. well, boys. I love having brothers. I see as I get older, that by being around all boys, i have a greater connection with guys and tend to be friends with them more than girls. They're just way cooler! I love the difference in opinion, world view, past times, etc. Even the way they worship and hear from God is slightly different than a females. It's a complete person when two are together. So yeah, family. I love them. Family is always honest with me, there for me, backing me up, picking fights, causing drama, loving, caring... I wouldn't be who I am today without the blessing of the family that I have.
so that's about it folks! Hope you learned something haha!
